My daddy was many things, but one of the things he was best at, I think, was wood carvings. He made a lot of these little boots, as well as ducks, deer, bear, snakes, etc.

(I was moving these boots to take a picture and discovered that one of them is full of teeth. I was slightly unnerved until my nephew Sawyer told me that that is where he and his oldest brother, Brayden, keep the teeth they lose.)

A friend of mine has a request for his son ----


He has been asked to survey people that live in the United States using only three questions. The more responses he gets the better the grade. It is a political poll but no personal information is needed except for what state in which you reside. He has been asked to do this from now through the end of March. The questions are the same questions a lot of media polls ask but the purpose of this assignment is to take away the bias of the media and see what mainstream Americans are saying without the possible influence that the media may have upon the results.

I would love to see him get 10,000+ unique responses but the only way for that to happen is with your help, pass the link to others you know, and have them to do the same. The survey only has three questions (four counting the state you in which you reside) and should take less than 10 seconds to complete.


The survey is here

When Worship Music

Isn't.



Jesus is a Friend of Mine. He really is.

This song isn't.



And, well, it isn't praise and worship, and it isn't supposed to be, but I was reminded of this video last night during a conversation about what happens when "old" people try to be hip with the young people.

Definitely isn't.



And, definitely ISN'T. (Just a note, this was originally removed from youtube, so it may disappear at some point)

Happy Valentine's Day

A week late. I'm trying to get caught up here. My other blog Through the Windshield is also desperately behind, and I am hoping to remedy that, at least in part, today.

Times being what they are, and finances being what they are, Bernard and I just went out to eat and to the bookstore (by ourselves!!!). We decided on Cheddar's and after a wait of about 35 minutes, ate until we were literally stuffed. I'm not sure, but I vaguely remember Bernard rolling me out of there. But, oh man, it was good!!!

(Mushy warning ahead)
I know a lot of women who are married to men who are simply jerks. And, they don't mind being jerks to their wife in front of her friends and/or coworkers. That irks me beyond belief. Their husbands are thoughtless, obsessive, paranoid, and just generally crass.

I'm NOT married to one of them.

My husband is awesome. Yes, he has his faults, but they are small compared to many. Also, his attributes so far outweigh the faults it is not funny. He is more than willing to admit fault and say, "I'm sorry," and I have never felt unloved, or unwanted. I've also never had to question his faithfulness to me and the family, and he is truly a man of integrity. If he says it, he means it, and if he promises it, he will deliver.

So, Bernard, it is a bit late, but this is for you --

Out of the Mouths. . .

This conversation occurred while I was fixing lunch for the sprogs today.

Princess: Mama, how does Jesus live in our hearts?

Me: (Not entirely surprised, she has been asking this question A LOT lately). Well, when we ask Jesus to forgive our sins, and become our Savior, he lives in our hearts.

Princess: But, MAMA, how does he get food there? Does he make it go from our stomach to our hearts so that he can have something to eat?????

Disconnect

Through the years, I've had the opportunity to see what it is like to be part of a preacher's family, without actually having been married to, or the child of, a preacher.

One event I remember, is that in college, my best friend was a preacher's kid. One summer, I was invited to go on the family vacation to Hilton Head, SC with them. They knew that a member of the congregation was very sick, but her dad decided to go anyway. He went for one day, had to come back home the next, preach the funeral the next, and made it back to Hilton Head for the last full day of vacation. :/

We have several family members that are preachers.

Through the years, we've had the privilege of being friends with pastors and their families (both of our own church and outside of our church).

I am in constant awe at how the family has to share their husband and daddy. However, what I experienced Sunday was unlike anything I've ever felt, or imagined feeling. I can't say that I liked it. :/

Long, very convoluted, story short, our pastor resigned last Wednesday night. He gave no notice, and my husband was chosen to fill in on Sunday morning. He is not a preacher. He has not been called to preach, and he made it a point to tell the congregation that he was "teaching," not preaching.

I had watched him prepare on Saturday. I knew roughly what he was going to address. Yet, while he was on stage (looking fine, I might add, though it is a bit non sequitur ) he became the "preacher" and I was just a member of the "congregation." Though we were still married, for the first time in our married life, his role for that 30 minutes or so was not as "husband."

I felt totally disconnected from him.

It was weird.

I became (and still am to some degree) a bit clingy. (I think he liked it at first, but is growing a bit weary of me hanging on to him all the time, now).

What I realized, though, is that the preacher's wife deals with that multiple times a week. For the women who can realize it, and for the pastors who know it, they can make a conscious effort to "reconnect" immediately.

But, if it is not realized, the disconnect carries from Sunday afternoon to Sunday night, and on Monday morning, each goes to work, or to do what they do, and they still have not reconnected.

Service after service.

Week after week.

Month after month.

Over time, the disconnect become "normal."

That's not cool. Or healthy.

If kids are in the house, I suspect it could be the same thing.

My prayer for all of my preacher friends, and their spouses, is that they connect each day, each week. That his wife is still his first ministry, and that he never forgets that. That his kids know him as daddy, first and foremost, and as preacher secondarily.

And, I continue to pray that the strain of the ministry in the church doesn't become a strain in the marital relationship.

Happy Birthday, Princess

My baby turned 4 today.


(around 11 days)



(around 7 months old)


(learning to pose early)







(18 months at Myrtle Beach. She LOVED the ocean. Especially when the waves knocked her over and swirled her around underneath the water. Oh yea, that was *fun.* At the end of the week, I looked at Bernard and said, "We are not coming back to the beach until both kids can swim." Travis has a healthy respect for the water. Kristi thinks she can swim.)






Kristi is, well, Kristi. At the ripe old age of four years old, she has all the answers and can provide you the questions as well. :) I could say a lot of things about Kristi, but here is a letter I wrote to her last year.

My dearest, most precious Princess Kristiana,

In the three years that you have crawled, walked, ran, and even engulfed this earth, I am amazed at how quickly you learn, and how adept you are at applying what you learn. You are absolutely beautiful, and the world seems captivated by your charming, chipped-tooth smile and sparkling blue eyes. You make people smile with you antics, and that is good.

However, as 3 turns to 4 and 5 and older, it might not be as cute. In light of that, can we please lay down some ground rules?

1. What goes up, will come back down. This includes, but is definitely not limited to, stuffed animals in the ceiling fans, golf balls, frisbees, food, and you. Yep. If you jump, you will land. The higher you jump, the harder you will land. I know that you think pink casts are "cute," and I know that you were absolutely, unabashedly impressed with Dr. Hedric and Ruth (especially) at Blue Ridge Bone and Joint, but that does not mean we need to make annual, or bi-annual visits there. Please, stop jumping off of the furniture. You cannot fly. I know this for a fact. I am a mama.

2. What goes in, will come out. One end or the other. I promise. When mama says, "Don't put that in your mouth," please listen. I am waiting for me to become a penny richer, and you a penny poorer.

3. Clothes are for wearing. I am very proud that you can put your own clothes on (even backwards). I am also proud that you can take them off. That means you are getting to be a big girl. However, there are rules that our society expects you to follow. At home, a diaper is fine. But, when mama's students arrive, you really need to keep your clothes on. Hannah and Elizabeth don't mind, but I think it may kinda bother Trail, McKinley and Seth. Also, it really alarms me when the preacher says "Amen," and I look up only to see you standing there grinning -- with nothing but your diaper on. When the grown ups are praying, please keep your clothes on.

4. The animals. Please be kind to the animals. Boomer, our dog, likes to play fetch. Chopper, the fish, does not. Please don't try to play with him, it makes him nervous.

5. Paper. Paper is very good for writing. And you are writing very well. You make the cutest little circles. But, this means write on the paper. Not the wall, the desks, the table, mama's business stuff, daddy's church stuff, the computer monitor, music books, or the pews at church. Especially not with those cool black Sharpie pens that daddy uses for work.

6. The refrigerator is NOT a good hiding place for your toys. Or you, either, for that matter.

7. Neither is the trash can.

8. You talk very well. And everyone can understand almost all of what you say. This is good. Sort of. Please don't tell everyone everything that Brooks or your brother says. Calling your Sunday School teacher (even if it is just me) a dweeb isn't nice.

9. I know Brayden, Chase, Sawyer and Brooks like to play tackle football. Travis does as well. However, they are bigger than you. Much bigger. You cannot tackle them. Please stop trying. Also, don't let them tackle you. They will hurt you, even if they don't mean to.

Kristi, I love you.
Mom

Now, where did you go?





Birthday Number ONE:


NUMBER FOUR


Happy Birthday, Princess

In the Beginning

In the beginning, God. . . .

IF that was all the Bible said, I think I could find peace in it. Before there was time, before there was sin, before there was anything, there was God.

AND, it doesn't end there. God is NOW and God will always BE. Nothing outlasts Him; nothing outsmarts Him; nothing confounds Him; nothing confuses Him; nothing alarms Him.

Ummmm. . . . . .

Anyone that knows me even a little bit knows that in the kitchen, I am a disaster waiting to happen.

To say the least, I am culinarily challenged. I choose to think my skills lie elsewhere, thankyouverymuch.

So, last night, I decided to make chocolate chip cookies. From scratch.

I also had an idea I wanted to try. I put a little spoonful of chipless cookie batter on the cookie sheet, sat a kiss on it, then covered it up with more batter. My thoughts were that it would be cool to have this cookie and when you bit into it, would find wonderful chocolate-y, gooey goodness.

But, I forgot how chocolate chip cookies "spread" as they cook. I think I needed thicker batter. :)

Anyway, here are the cookies. I have several names for them, none of which my husband approves.

hahahahahahahahahahahaha breathe, breathe, hahahahahahahahahahhaha.

Gray Days

If it is going to be gray in January, I want snow, not rain. :) Of course, today would have been a BAD day for nasty weather because Bernard was on the road. Still, though.

Of course, the weather kinda matches my mood. :P

Last night was the first night in over a week that I didn't have a dream where I was trying to hold back a rolling car, being washed over by waves at high tide, driving in a flood, swimming in deep water and not getting up to breath, or something similar. I'm not one to do "dream interpretation," but I have been feeling fairly overwhelmed lately, and I think it is smacking me in my sleep.

My pictures are also showing it, somewhat. For the past week, even my color shots have been black and white. No kidding.

These shots, for example, were shot in color. Processed, and never converted to black and white, but still . . . .








I believe it is time for me to "Be still, and know that HE IS GOD."

No matter what the future holds, it is okay. He will take care of my family, and whatever His plan, if the status quo for my life does change, it will be for the better in the long run.

Scary? Very much so. At least for me. I don't like change. Heck, I'm not all hot fired happy over "challenges" in life. So at this point, when things *could* stay the same, or they *could* change majorily, I have to trust God. If I try to deal with it on my own, I will fighting those waves for quite some time.

It IS time for me to be still.

Is His Education Failing Him?

or is he a helpless Romeo?



One of Trav's assignments this morning was to complete a nursery rhyme with a spelling word.

1. Georgie Porgie, puddin' and pie
Kissed the girls and made them _________________.

He read it, looked up at me, and said, "Sigh?"

I said, "no, look at the list of your words."

He read through them and said, "Cry?"

"WHY WOULD THE GIRLS CRY?????"

Hmmmmmm

Only when processing this picture did I realize the inherent "danger" I put myself in. . . . .

Happy Birthday, NINAW

Tuesday (tomorrow) is my mom's birthday. To celebrate, because our family is always looking for an excuse to go eat, we went to the Grizzly Grill at Smoky Falls Lodge -- Kasey's newest place of employment.

It was a small group, of course. My mom, her brothers Johnny/Clint (some people call him Johnny, others call him Clint -- don't ask me, I don't know), Claude, her sister "Gert," Gert's son, wife, two kids, my brother, his wife, 4 boys, my sister, her husband, two kids, Kasey, (boyfriend) Martin, my husband, two kids and myself. All in a restaurant. All together. Actually, they put us at 4 or 5 tables...

But, I digress.

So, my mom has a birthday. I could wax eloquent with mushy stuff, but anyone that knows my mom knows that doesn't fit. I stopped buying her mother's day cards years ago, because they were all sentimental and mom isn't. Mother's are generally associated with pretty flowers, softness, gentleness, etc. etc. etc.

My mom is more like brick walls and scrapping your way to the top. :)

But, we love her and we know that she loves us.

Ninaw (with the princess tiara) and her sister, Geraldine ("Gert")

The Adventure

I decided to go to the grocery store today (yea -- triple coupons). The only problem was that yesterday I had to leave the van at the bottom of the hill and walk in.

That means I had to walk OUT to the van today.

I waited until the thermometer showed over 40 (42 to be exact) and bundled the kids up for a trek.

Here is what we were facing --



Turn to the left 90d and this is what you see --


(There really is a difference between northern exposure and southern exposure).

Just to review --

Northern exposure


Southern exposure



Kristi, who is not quite 4, felt the whole journey *might* be too long for her, so we offered to assist in her transportation. Obviously, I couldn't take a picture of myself, so here is Trav showing our mode of transportation



Since I didn't know what faced me on the other side of the hill, my plan was to use the sled to haul the groceries back in the event that our van wouldn't climb the hill. However, the sun had helped us out and melted the first leg of the driveway, and the part I couldn't make it up yesterday (when it looked like this)

Before/After




On my other blog -- another picture from our neighborhood

Snow. Finally.

In My Head

I have a difficult time focusing, sometimes. (OK, a lot of the time). I don't know if it is because I was so intensely focused in high school and college, and I just used it all up, or what, but, oh look a shiny thing!

See what I mean?

My train of thought took off yesterday at church without my permission. Fortunately, I didn't have any major goofs (like not having a clue what verse of the song the choir is singing is on -- somewhat critical since I'm the one leading them), and it actually ended up being a good time of introspection and becoming painfully aware of where I am falling short in some areas.

We were singing a song called "Do You Know my Jesus?" and the chorus goes like this --

Do you know my Jesus?
Do you know my Friend?
Have you heard He loves you?
And that He will abide till the end?

Throughout the rest of the song, my stream of consciousness (man, I've ALWAYS wanted to use that phrase in a blog entry) streamed away. (My thoughts are in the parenthesis).

Who hears your call for comfort?
When naught but sorrow you feel?
(No me. I care, but not enough to do something about it.)

Do you know my Jesus? (I made a resolution this year).
Do you know my Friend? (I want to genuinely love people more).
Have you heard He loves you? (But, do people know I love them? Do I love them?)
And that He will abide till the end? (Why can't I let go of the petty teasing that warped me when I was 10. They were kids for crying out loud. They did NOT mean it.)

Who knows your disappointments?
Who hears each time you cry? (I can't let go of it because I don't want to get hurt again).
Who understands your heartaches?
Who dries the tears from your eyes? (Jesus wasn't afraid to be hurt. He let Himself be hurt -- for me.)

Do you know my Jesus? (Our SS lesson was about doing tough stuff)
Do you know my Friend? (Our focus verse was Phil 4:13 -- I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength)
Have you heard He loves you? (I told the kids they could do anything God wanted them to do, with His strength)
And that He will abide till the end. (But, can I do what God wants me to do?)

The song ended, and I sat down almost numb. I don't remember much about the message (and what I do remember is irrelevant for anything in life), but I do know that it is time.

It is time for me to start truly loving people.

It is time to let down the barrier around my heart. Yea, that barrier that I've only let a very, very select few people in, even if it means they may hurt me.

It is okay to be vunerable (even as I write this my heart and/or mind screams, "NO IT ISN'T!!!!!!"), to let others into my "space." I may get hurt. Or, I may hurt them. But, pain is OK, and it is temporary. Jesus knows pain. He knows the pain of rejection and betrayal. If I am not willing to risk the pain (which may NOT be inevitable), I cannot truly love people. And, if I can't truly love them, I can't fully serve them. If I cannot serve them, I cannot show them Jesus.

For I can do ALL things through Jesus who gives me strength. Phil 4:13

Ummmm, Okay

Do you have a membership to a gym or fitness center?? If so, you may want to hop on over to Baskin Robbins and get you some ice cream!

Yep, show proof of your gym membership, that you probably have to lose weight and be healthier, and you can reward yourself with ice cream.

Granted, it is fat-free, dairy-free, and has no added sugar.

Or, maybe they have fat-free versions, dairy-free versions, and low sugar versions. The website was a bit sketchy about that. I hope so, because how in the heck would it taste with no fat, no dairy and no sugar?

blech.

To be perfectly honest, just give me real ice cream and I will exercise a few extra minutes or something.

And, don't worry, BR still has real ice cream as well.

Perhaps. . .

Perhaps I should start another blog where I simply share pictures of the hottest man in my life. . .

Bernard.

Ya'll would like that, wouldn't you (all three of my regular readers, one of whom is Bernard, himself, and the other two who are male and the occasional female who drifts by?)

So, for your viewing pleasure, well, Okay, then, MY viewing pleasure, here is the man, himself. . . .

Happy Birthday, Travis

(Trav at 11 weeks)




(Both of these are Trav at 11 months)




On Sunday, my oldest turns 7. Simply unbelievable. It seems like just a few days ago, he was a little round faced baby.

He's quite the character. He loves to read, hates math (like his mom!), is very particular about schedules and following the rules (like his dad!), likes sports, especially football and golf, and loves fishing and airplanes. His newest interest is "archery," though bow-hunting may be a bit more accurate.



(Golfer Trav was 3 in this pic, and Football Trav was 6)



He likes pizza and spaghetti, cartoons and video games. He can be quite a grouch in the mornings, but is usually a joy to be around.

He has an incredible sense of humor, but is also wildly self-conscious.

He likes to sing and "play" guitar, but only if no one is listening.

From his birthday party --




(See that cute little gal in the top picture with the big, red hair? I can't decide if she looks like her mom or her dad. . . . . hahha)

And finally, just to compare --

Trav's first birthday --


Trav at number 7 --



Happy Birthday, Little Man. I love you!!!!

2009 Resolutions

Not that I'm any good at keeping resolutions, but my internal wiring just seems to compel me to do it. :) I'm also the type that will not start a new project on any day except Monday, unless forced to, and I eat M&Ms after sorted by color.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. Galatians 5:22 - 23

1. LOVE I want to be more loving. To my husband and my kids, to my extended family, and I want to learn to truly love those that I disagree with, or that "hate" me.

2. JOY Yes, I want to have joy, but I also want to spread joy. I want to be an encouragement to those around me.

3. PEACE If I had to describe my existence in 2008 with one word, it would be contentious. It seemed every time I turned around I was in a minor disagreement, or an all out argument with someone -- usually someone I couldn't see or didn't even know, but also with people that I care greatly about. While I'm all for sharing my opinion and open discussions on topics, I MUST learn to control my temper and say things in such a way that respects those I disagree with. I do NOT need to argue, fight and scratch. Also, if I can bring peace, I want to do that. If I can discuss peaceably, or I can't bring the peace, I just need to stay away.

4. LONGSUFFERING. I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old (very nearly 7 and 4) that I homeschool. 'nuf said.

5. KINDNESS I want to be kinder to people whether in word or deed, and without provocation. So many times I think of something I would like to do for someone and talk myself out of it because I convince myself that they would not be interested. How warped is that?

6. GOODNESS This is a broad one. For me, it reminds me of my "convicting sense of humor." I find something outrageously funny, and God convicts me that it isn't something I should be laughing at. :/ I must do better. I do believe God has a sense of humor, but I don't think He would laugh at some of the things I laugh at.

7. FAITHFULNESS Jesus has done so much in my life. If it were not for Him, I am fairly certain there would be no Karma today. Am I faithful to what He has called me to do? I want to read the Bible more (I'm currently on a "read in a year" plan), pray more -- deliberate prayers, not out of habit, and do my job(s) at church with joy and lose the grumbling (I grumble a lot). Christ was tortured and died for my sins -- my service to Him should be out of love and thankfulness, not out of obligation or duty.

8. GENTLENESS I am about as gentle as an elephant. If I were a man, I'd probably hang out in a recliner, unshaven and 50 pounds overweight, in a wife beater t-shirt yelling at my wife to bring me a pabst blue ribbon, belching, scratching myself and being rude and crude to those around me. Just kidding. Well, at least on the PBR part. I've resigned myself to the fact that I'll never be a girly-girl, but it is high time to start being a bit more gentle and meek in my dealing with those around me -- especially those in authority over me.

9. SELF-CONTROL You know what? Paul could have left this one off. Really. I guess this is where my resolution to lose 75 pounds would be. And to spend more time offline. And to not procrastinate as much as I do. And to hold my tongue when I really have a sharp retort. And to keep the school schedule as much as is possible. And any number of other things, but you get the idea.

Happy New Year and may you have a blessed 2009!