Can You Hear Me Now?

I guess my favorite quote -- the one that challenges me and inspires me daily, is attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson.

"What you do speaks so loudly I cannot hear what you say."

Simply put, actions are much louder than words.

I can say, "I love you," but if I ignore you, or deliberately try to hurt you, my mouth is going to be moving, but you are not going to hear anything coming out.

Tangentially related is that "perception is reality." It may, of course, be an incorrect reality, but it is, in effect what is "real" to the person. If I am "seeing" something, that becomes what I see as reality.

Every experience we have is interpreted through a filter of past experiences, beliefs, ideas, and preconceived notions. Is it any wonder that being an effective communicator is considered a talent?

As a result, I have been pondering silence. Holding my tongue when I really, really, really want to say something. Some will say that "Silence is golden," but I have found that silence is rarely, if ever, taken to be positive. Therein lies the crux of my dilemma. I want to say *something* to make a situation better, but I feel that saying something will probably just make the issue worse, so I remain silent. And then I begin to wonder if my silence gives the impression that I am something that I am not.

Is my action (or inaction, as it may be) being interpreted in a way that I don't mean for it to be?
Are my actions matching my words?