Saturday, October 18, 2008

If

If I could go back one week, would I do anything different?

If I could go back one week, and change this week, would I?

I can only trust God that His will is good and perfect. Despite the pain and heartbreak this week has brought our family, and despite the tremendous loss and void left, I have to trust Him.

A life ended at 22 is beyond understanding.

Just when I think the tears are gone, I find out I'm wrong. Just when I think I am about to come to grips with it, the surreal feeling of this week slaps me in the face.

Even after the funeral, when we were at the community center eating, I kept looking for you and wondering where you were. Then, I remembered.

You are loved, and you will be missed more than you would have ever dreamed -- by many more people than you ever thought possible.

We love you.

And, I trust I will see you again. Until then, rest in the peace of His arms.

Rachel.
2/28/1986 - 10/13/2008

3 comments:

M. Steve Heartsill said...

Karma...I am so sorry for your loss...you and Mr. B. have been in my prayers since I learned of it...

I don't always agree with God's purposes, and I certainly don't always understand them or even appreciate them.

However, over time, His purposes are right. And just. And loving.

lswhitson said...

Karma- Kimberly sent me to your pic of Rachel and then I found "If." Thanks- for putting into words what my heart is trying to feel. And the pic is perfect too. Thank you-

Anonymous said...

Karma...Thank you from the bottom of my heart for remembering Rachel in such a special, profoundly moving way. I guess we all have our "Ifs" to deal with...me, more so than most.
Love to you and yours,
Rachel's Mommie